I dream a lot! My dreams are typically very vivid and colorful. Some I remember, some I forget and others are sparked well after the fact when something triggers in my memory. The messages are usually pretty obvious, like the one I had a few nights ago…
It started out with a recent crush of mine who soon transformed into someone I have never actually met. We were in love, like the early stages of excitable energy. I was confused because I had no recollection of him prior to this moment of feeling elated and so I asked him “how did we meet?” He began a story about first noticing me at a party or event – I was instantly transported to his recollected memory. I was wearing a red dress I used to own and was involved with someone else at the time. He talked of falling for me right then but it was months later that we actually met and began our connection. Then he said something shocking and I remember the exact words “I used to think you were pregnant, but now I know you just like beer!”
I was stunned and wanted to be offended but then I realized that this man wasn’t insulting me, he was loving me for exactly who I was and I fell for him even more.
This dream makes sense, you see, earlier in that day I was asked by a teenager if I was pregnant. Perhaps the third time in my life this questions has come up. It stings for sure, but I don’t waste too much time on it. Innocent mistakes are no reason to ruffle feathers and I’ve never placed a huge amount of weight (pun, intended) on external opinions of others. I’m more interested in sensation. How it feels.
Despite my belly, making deep twists hard and even yoga pants feel tight, I feel great and am happy with who I am. I’m strong, active, eat well and very healthy. My love of beer comes at a price I’m willing to pay, especially if it means finding those who accept me because of it. I may abstain for periods of time – just to make sure I’m not too attached to anything, but in the end I’m reminded that life is short and our worth is marked by the love we share with others. I vow to love you for all of your perceived shortcomings. I know who you really are is so far beyond the limits of this body or the hateful things we say about ourselves in our mind. You deserve to be loved for who you really are and don’t doubt for a moment that I’ve held out this long in partnership for someone who will fulfill this dream of mine.
If you’re looking for some positive yoga body inspiration, check out this local event.
If you want to enjoy Yoga + Beer with me, I’ll be leading a class at Big Stump Brewery on May 14th 11am-12pm. $20 for class plus a pint. Sign up Here!